interdictor ([info]interdictor) wrote,
@ 2007-01-02 10:35:00
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Parental Oversight
What exactly are parents doing to supervise their children these days? Do they even care about their kids, or are the latter merely inconvenient distractions, unplanned and annoying? Anytime the latest statistics on teenage sexual activity, alcohol and drug use, or standardized testing are released, it's apparent that parents are negligent in the extreme.

Here's an example:

Teens binge drink

WASHINGTON (Reuters) - Nearly half of all U.S. high-school students admit to recently drinking alcohol illegally, and most of them were binge drinkers, according to a government survey published on Tuesday. These binge drinkers -- who had five or more drinks in a row -- were more likely to have sex, fight, smoke or use drugs, the study by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention found.

"Our study clearly shows that it's not just that students drink alcohol, but how much they drink that most strongly affects whether they experience other health and social problems," said Dr. Jacqueline Miller of the CDC's Alcohol Team, who led the study. "It also underscores the importance of implementing effective strategies to prevent underage and binge drinking, such as enforcing the minimum legal drinking age and reducing alcohol marketing to youth, which can help us change social norms regarding the acceptability of underage and binge drinking."

Across the United States, the minimum drinking age is 21, while most teens leave high school by age 17, 18 or 19. Writing in the journal Pediatrics, the CDC team said they analyzed data from 15,214 high-school students (aged 14 to 18) who completed the 2003 Youth Risk Behavior Survey. They found that 45 percent of the students admitted having drunk alcohol in the past month. Of these, 64 percent were binge-drinkers.

And the binge drinkers were not simply experimenting -- 69 percent reported having done so more than once in the past 30 days. Teen drinkers in general were more than twice as likely to be sexually active as non-drinkers, the researchers found. They were more than four times as likely to smoke cigarettes and more than twice as likely to have been in a physical fight, the researchers found. These rates went up even higher for binge drinkers, they reported. The binge drinkers were more than five times as likely as non-drinkers to be sexually active, more than 18 times as likely to smoke cigarettes, and more than four times as likely to have been in a physical fight. They were also far more likely to smoke marijuana and attempt suicide, the researchers said.

Drinkers also did more poorly in school, according to the survey.

Among other studies on teenage alcohol use, in September the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration found that 16.5 percent of 12- to 17-year-olds admitted to drinking. That study included students younger than high school age. The 2006 Monitoring the Future survey, done by the University of Michigan and published in December, found that 75 percent of 12th graders, the oldest high school students, had tried alcohol.

Where are their parents?


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[info]kathygnome
2007-01-02 03:48 pm UTC (link)
Their parents are the same place mine were in the 80s when we were doing it?

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(no subject) - [info]interdictor, 2007-01-02 03:50 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]kathygnome, 2007-01-02 03:55 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]interdictor, 2007-01-02 03:56 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]kathygnome, 2007-01-02 03:57 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]interdictor, 2007-01-02 04:00 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]downtym, 2007-01-02 04:57 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]interdictor, 2007-01-02 04:59 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]downtym, 2007-01-02 09:54 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]belindashort, 2007-01-03 11:51 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]joethecabdriver, 2007-01-02 04:12 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]evilegg, 2007-01-02 03:52 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]interdictor, 2007-01-02 03:56 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]cluebyfour, 2007-01-02 04:11 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]interdictor, 2007-01-02 04:13 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]cluebyfour, 2007-01-02 04:18 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]interdictor, 2007-01-02 04:20 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]temp_revenge, 2007-01-02 06:53 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]serene_orange, 2007-01-17 11:22 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]evilegg, 2007-01-02 09:21 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]interdictor, 2007-01-02 10:09 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]downtym, 2007-01-03 01:08 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]carrot_khan, 2007-01-03 03:39 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]zarex, 2007-01-03 04:00 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]evilegg, 2007-01-03 03:24 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]zarex, 2007-01-03 03:46 pm UTC
Working or whoring it up.
[info]a_motley_fool
2007-01-02 03:57 pm UTC (link)
I blame the two income trap and procreating without a partner around to share the workload children bring into a marriage (relationship, whatever). I don't trust children they do stupid things, they need someone around to tell them that what they're doing is stupid. Kids are a great deal of work but some where along the line it became acceptable to have a kid and not have a plan for it.

I live in Phila and we have roving gangs of kids (not talking about the actual gangs -- we have those too) who walk around University City looking for college students to beat up. They just sucker punch them and then run away.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

Re: Working or whoring it up. - [info]earthdotprime, 2007-01-02 07:21 pm UTC
Re: Working or whoring it up. - [info]a_motley_fool, 2007-01-02 08:50 pm UTC
Re: Working or whoring it up. - [info]serene_orange, 2007-01-17 11:25 am UTC

[info]serene_orange
2007-01-02 04:12 pm UTC (link)
that is amazing to me. I guarentee you that I will notice if my boy (now age 13) looks hungover on Saturday morning. You can smell it on them even if they brush their teeth and shower. It comes through their pores. It wouldn't be ignored either. It would be addressed tout suite, out in the hot texas sun (just to make him feel shitty while I talked to him about the stupidity of binge and underage drinking)

(Reply to this)(Thread)

I hear that, mama! - [info]interdictor, 2007-01-02 04:14 pm UTC
Re: I hear that, mama! - [info]unknown_lamer, 2007-01-02 04:47 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]evilegg, 2007-01-02 09:26 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]serene_orange, 2007-01-02 09:31 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]malathion, 2007-01-17 10:35 am UTC

[info]carrot_khan
2007-01-02 04:21 pm UTC (link)
I was pretty supervised as well, but somehow my younger sister was getting away with exactly what the article discusses and we were not two years apart. I don't know how my parents didn't notice. Perhaps since she was on the honor roll and I was not, clearly she wasn't doing anything wrong. My younger brother came out squeaky clean too and he was significantly less supervised than myself (being both the baby and the boy).

I can't explain it, but my sister taught me what to look for so my sons won't be able to pull the same tricks when they come of age. Somewhere parents forgot how to be parents in their quest for either world domination (that need for two jobs) or being friends with their kids (damn dirty hippies). I think we (as a generation) need to start re-learning these lost skills.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]downtym, 2007-01-03 01:17 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]carrot_khan, 2007-01-03 03:02 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]downtym, 2007-01-03 06:40 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]carrot_khan, 2007-01-03 06:58 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]downtym, 2007-01-04 12:11 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]downtym, 2007-01-04 12:12 am UTC

[info]tygrrtwo
2007-01-02 04:37 pm UTC (link)
When I was in high school, my parents were working to live, trying to pay the mortgages and bills, separated after 30 years of marriage and my dad had no idea what I was up to. And I was right there with them holding down a job since I was 13, sometimes two and three jobs so I could help out my mom... and still I was boozing it up and going to clubs or parties on weekends. Where were my friends' parents? usually on vacation... it was very much a Risky Business meets Ferris Bueller's Day off kind of thing, parents of kids who were 14-19 would go away for a weekend, entrust the place to the kids and bamf, party time. Word of whose parents were away spreads through high school like wildfire, people lied for others, guys with deep voices would answer the phone pretending to be the parents... in retrospect it's amazing that more of us didn't get caught/die/drown/get hospitalized for alcohol poisoning/burn down the house etc.

One thing my parents did right was introduce me to wine during family dinners since I was 8 or 9, while I love to drink and always have, I was one of the very few in my crowd who didn't view alcohol as this amazing holy grail of partydom. I was the last to get drunk and usually the only one who kept her pants on when guys tried to get me to pass out and do it. Oh lovely high school date rape, how prevalent art thou. ugh.

(Reply to this)


[info]skycriesx
2007-01-02 04:40 pm UTC (link)
I accomplished all of the above in highschool without the binge drinking! Go me!

(Reply to this)


[info]starspiritgate
2007-01-02 04:45 pm UTC (link)
I'm seventeen, and my alcohol intake in the past six months can be summed up in: Half a glass of red wine on Christmas day. Which my father poured out for me. Drinking age in Ontario is 19, I believe, but alcohol just has little appeal to me.

I'm not exactly supervised, though; I think my parents just trust that I won't do anything stupid or take an experimental drink to extremes.

(Reply to this)


[info]megadog
2007-01-02 04:47 pm UTC (link)
Strikes me that the US still has deep Prohibition-era/religious-puritanist hangups about alcohol and other recreational pharmaceuticals. Here in the UK/Europe the legal age to buy alcohol is generally 18 and it can be served with a meal in a restaurant/club/hotel situation to people of 16 and up so long as it's bought by someone over 18. We grow up with the stuff - it's not uncommon for pre-teens to have dilute wine with their meals.

I just don't have problems with kids having early access to alcohol - provided they are introduced to it in a controlled environment so learn how to use it in a restrained and sensible way. I suspect that the 'forbidden fruit' thing of restricting access can only serve to make it [and recreational drugs too] more attractive as a thing-to-do. Same goes for sex - so long as it's safe-sex and nobody ends up pregnant/with STDs, where's the problem?

If you're old enough to drive/vote/enlist/die for your country that country should also recognise that you're old enough to be trusted with a few beers.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]thevirtualjim, 2007-01-03 01:43 am UTC

[info]ms_cantrell
2007-01-02 04:54 pm UTC (link)
i don't think any of that is new. maybe y'all were well behaved in hs, but the stuff in that article was the norm for me, and for the three or four highschools i socialized with 20 years ago.

omg. i was in hs 20 years ago. shoot me now.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]temp_revenge, 2007-01-02 06:52 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]quick_step, 2007-01-03 02:35 am UTC

[info]tuscendi
2007-01-02 05:29 pm UTC (link)
I'm in my sixties. I've been asking the same question for years. Well, not exactly the same question, because it's not just a matter of lack of supervision. It's more about abdication of parental responsibility.

I've observed so many children misbehaving so badly while in the care and custody and presence of their parents. I've seen parents refuse to give direction, much less correction, to children. Instead, the parent asks the toddler child's permission to speak.

The very intelligent parent parent of a very disturbed child told me a couple of years ago that she couldn't do anything about her daughter's extreme and twisted behavior such as "cutting" because "everyone's doing it." I told her that she should start by depriving the child of all freedom, "because I'm the mommy," explaining to the child that she could earn the freedom back, in increments, by demonstrating the requisite level of skill, self-control and responsibility. The parent couldn't believe the insensitivity, not to say the violence, of my approach.

Then there is the societal conspiracy of silence whereby relatives, teachers, staffers of libraries, stores, banks, churches, cemeteries, you name it, refuse to even glance in the direction of a misbehavior child, much less shoot them so much as a disapproving look or shake of the head.

As a kid I was loved and taught pretty well. But there were serious problems. Supervision was uneven, depending on the strains and state of mind of my overburdened mother who by that time lacked a husband. I engaged in bits of misbehavior that should have been prevented by supervision and more worthy engagement. There were consequences. But I wasn't a totally lost, abandoned, vapid, amoral and asocial personality that seems to be prevalent amongst the young these days.

For these and many other "toxic culture" reasons I'd say we have millions of young Nazis in training, and heaven help us all.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]corvus1970, 2007-01-02 07:15 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]kayjayuu, 2007-01-02 11:01 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]tuscendi, 2007-01-03 12:12 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]downtym, 2007-01-03 01:06 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]tuscendi, 2007-01-03 02:23 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]downtym, 2007-01-03 06:20 pm UTC

[info]lostjohn
2007-01-02 05:32 pm UTC (link)
I think it's great that young U.S kids are drinking at 17 and 18.

The last batch of U.S Troops that came on shore leave here (Portsmouth, UK) were shocking at managing their alcohol. We met up with a bunch of them in a pub and proceded to give them an education in drinking. I really felt for the poor bastards, the hangovers they must have had the next day must have been terrible.

So - the earlier they start, the less chance of being embarrassed by a bunch of limey students :-D!

(Reply to this)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]temp_revenge, 2007-01-02 06:53 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]ravan, 2007-01-02 09:50 pm UTC

[info]babalon_it
2007-01-02 05:35 pm UTC (link)
Dude - according to their description - *I'm* a binge drinker! I occasionally have 5 glasses of wine at a party. OMG! This sounds like the kind of "study" designed to freak out parents. Letting your teenager go to a party is a perfectly normal thing for most parents to do. The only problem I see here is the sensationalist descriptions presented in this article. Oh horrors - teens have sex. Oh horrors - teens try smoking. Pah. This isn't news, dude, or science. This is fear-mongering.

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(no subject) - [info]belindashort, 2007-01-03 11:46 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]babalon_it, 2007-01-04 01:00 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]belindashort, 2007-01-04 03:35 am UTC

[info]fletch31526
2007-01-02 06:13 pm UTC (link)
I agree with [info]babalon_it. There *have* always been good kids and bad kids... Teenagers have always tried alcohol, smoking, drugs & sex in high school to some degree. I agree that there is more of it today with the two-parents-working and teenager-with-a-car families out there, but this isn't a news flash. I've never done the drug thing, but I took up drinking and sexing in high school.

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[info]unclebill35
2007-01-02 06:28 pm UTC (link)
I was a good kid in HS. Three sport letterman (soccer, basketball, track); Academic Honors; Advanced Placement classes; Jr. and Sr. Class Officer; wrote, directed, and co-starred in short play; yadda, yadda. And I drank, binge-like, on occasion. I did not use drugs except once, didn't smoke or fight (by choice) and didn't have sex (not really by choice, but maybe kinda).

1340 on SATs, top tier college admission. High School Class of 1984.

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(no subject) - [info]downtym, 2007-01-03 12:56 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]quick_step, 2007-01-03 02:43 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]downtym, 2007-01-03 06:14 pm UTC

[info]temp_revenge
2007-01-02 06:51 pm UTC (link)
Holy shit. What I did in High School makes binge drinking pale in comparison. They'll be harvesting my spine for LSD long after I'm dead.

...and my parents were very protective too.

(Reply to this)


[info]theholymac
2007-01-02 06:53 pm UTC (link)
I think it's a combination of many things.

First, teenagers have always done stuff like this. It's not really "news".

Second, while it's just as easy to lie and sneak out and to party as it was in the past, with both parents working full time nowadays, it's probably a lot easier to hide the after effects of partying than it once was.

Third, the US's drinking/driving ages are fucking retarded. Why on earth would you make it legal for someone to drive when they're right at the age that they're experimenting with alcohol, and then make it illegal for them to drink, thus pushing them to A: go some distance to drink, which usually means driving, and B: drink in large quantities, because who knows when you'll be able to again. And then it's pretty hard to get your license revoked, so if you get caught once or twice... eh.

It's as if the laws in the US were crafted to encourage drunk driving and to train people to binge drink from a young age.

If you look at Germany, you see that they let their kids get used to alcohol from a relatively young age. Since it's not as restricted, it's not as "taboo" as it is in the US, and thus not as alluring or exciting. You aren't allowed to drive until you're 18, so you've had a chance to explore your limits and know that you shouldn't be driving drunk. FInally, it costs a hell of a lot of time and money to get a driver's license over there (6 months of paid driving lessons), so you'll think twice before jepordizing your license.

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(Anonymous)
2007-01-02 07:04 pm UTC (link)
i do not think this is "fear mongering." children are starting this behavior at younger and younger ages. the stakes are also higher due to the "designer drugs" out there and AIDS. as one who spends a great of time around teens, i do not feel these stats are exaggerated or overrated.

the cause as i see it? parents giving their children too much freedom too soon. some parents are too wrapped up in their own careers, "finding themselves," or "me time" to properly supervise their children. other parents are too afraid of appearing "uncool" for disciplining their children. some parents don't want their children to be angry with them. if your child isn't angry with you once in awhile, you're not doing your job.

i work with "at risk" children. they don't want fancy vacations or expensive toys. they want their parents, both of them, to spend time with them, talk to them, be interested in their lives. i am hard on these children. i don't let them get away with anything. they work hard for me, not because they fear me. they respect me because they know i care enough about them to take the time to keep them in line. children want to know the adults are in charge.

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(no subject) - [info]tuscendi, 2007-01-03 02:32 am UTC

[info]squidb0i
2007-01-02 07:21 pm UTC (link)
Reason # 54754674647548689567847 that Sex Ed should be mandatory and all forms of contraception should be free: most people shouldn't breed, least of all by accident.

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[info]xplicit1283
2007-01-02 08:10 pm UTC (link)
My mother raised me on her own and while in high school I never did any of that stupid shit. Didn't even skip class...when I turned 21 I came out of my shell though...I started drinking, smoking (recently quit though,) am sexually active (we wont go there..,) have 2 tattooes, and both my ears are pierced. I did all of that in a matter of two years. I'm 23 now. All of it done by choice...ok most of it (like I said..we wont go there..)

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(no subject) - [info]belindashort, 2007-01-03 11:48 pm UTC

[info]ravan
2007-01-02 09:46 pm UTC (link)
I learned to drink *with* my parents. From beer shots as a small child, to wine with dinner, drinking was taught as something done socially, with family or friends in a safe place, and not to be hidden.

I never did drunken parties in high school. Why? My mom said, "If you want to smoke and drink, fine, let me know and I'll buy your cigarettes and booze. All I ask is that you do it at home, so you aren't in a wreck." I had access to her liquor cabinet, she only asked that I tell her if I used up something. It's not rebellion if you have permission, so it had no appeal.

I never had to sneak a drink. If I get drunk, even now, it's when I have a safe place to crash without driving.

These days, my mother would be arrested for contributing to the delinquency of a minor, in spite of the fact that by making it not taboo or forbidden, but supervised and ordinary, she took away most of the temptation.

The problem is the absolutist message we are sending. The forbidden fruit is always sweeter. Make moderate alcohol a part of regular family life, and it no longer has the allure of rebellion.

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(no subject) - [info]belindashort, 2007-01-03 11:48 pm UTC
Off topic: Go-farther.com
[info]nsca_cc
2007-01-02 09:50 pm UTC (link)
Hi Michael,
I am interested in purchasing go-farther.com. Could you please contact me at web@nsca-cc.org or 402-598-7990 to discuss whether or not you are interested in selling?

Thanks!

Michelle Buxton

(Reply to this)(Thread)

Re: Off topic: Go-farther.com - [info]interdictor, 2007-01-02 10:12 pm UTC
Re: Off topic: Go-farther.com - [info]nsca_cc, 2007-01-02 10:39 pm UTC
Re: Off topic: Go-farther.com - [info]malathion, 2007-01-17 10:32 am UTC

[info]k_kinnison
2007-01-02 10:29 pm UTC (link)
1. Forbidden fruit often leads to excess
2. Double income families don't have time to properly raise kids.. nor do single/seperated parents
3. Peer pressure
4. lack of any type of enforcement or punishment

I knew of kids on monday would spend all the time in class SLEEPING and dealing with hangovers. And another brag about filling up a persons bathtub with puke at a party.

(Reply to this)


[info]ekatarina
2007-01-03 04:01 am UTC (link)
I've read most of the comments and I am with you on the teenager activities.

When my gang went out into the hills where teen beer parties were common it was so we could get a clear sky with little light pollution. We put good money into those telescopes!

We also ended up with very little overt supervision since we all told our folks where we were going and were truthful about our activities and when we would be home.

"Going to Mike's, the numbers in the address book by the phone. We're having a potluck, then going bowling, then staying up very late watching movies at Johno's house. The usual gang plus Karen who is in town this weekend. I'll probably sleep over. Her number is under "Shoemaucher" in the address book. See you for dinner Sunday."

The only time my dad every "tracked me down" was for som every important family news. Other than that he left me alone and let me borrow the car.

My brother got into trouble often by staying our past his stated return time, getting speeding tickets, constantly aking for money, and then when he had restriction such as grounding or "no car" he would break the rules and get into even more trouble! Hell by grade 12 I didn't even have a curfew and my brother was practically under house arrest. I thought being a teenager was a lot of trouble and suckage so why make it harder on myself. If I was trustworthy I got trusted and got to do just about whatever I liked.

Brother whining after being caught again: "How can I get Dad to trust me?"
Me: "Stop giving him reasons not to."


In any case, I'm on your side.


Ekatarina

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[info]lightningcount8
2007-01-03 07:04 am UTC (link)
first let me point out the use of horid grammer "more poorly " in a sentence about of all things education.
Simply put if we didn't have such a puritanical society, the alcahol stigma wouldn't exist and teens wouldn't be binge drinking. I'm personly 19 years old and simply put parents can't possibly monitor every moment of their kids life. Its a societal problem, don't blaim parents, granted they are responcible for teaching kids right from wrong. My parents raised me with a very matter of fact aditude about alcahol, not giving it a negative stigma. Thus i've never binge drank. Pre-marital sex has existed as far back as time itself deal.

(Reply to this)


[info]sunrising
2007-01-03 01:20 pm UTC (link)
I was a latch key kid, and I didn't end up in the middle of all this debauchery ... my family also isn't religious. But at least my parents did teach me morals!

The growing problem these days is that so many parents don't take enough responsibility for their children and their children's behavior. Instead, they blame all the problems on TV, video games, teachers, schools, peers ... anyone but themselves. While I think it's ideal to be able to be with your kids as much as possible outside of school, it's not realistic. Working parents can still successfully parent, but it takes more work than families that are lucky enough to have a stay at home parent. It takes parents owning up to their parental title and responsibilities. duh.

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